


A Brief Lesson in Execution with Auruo Bossard

by HeichouJo (GirlGladiator)



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Bad Puns, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-18
Updated: 2013-12-18
Packaged: 2018-01-05 00:51:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1087636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GirlGladiator/pseuds/HeichouJo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When was the last time someone made Captain Levi laugh out loud?</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Brief Lesson in Execution with Auruo Bossard

**Author's Note:**

> Originally [posted to tumblr](http://shoujoheichou.tumblr.com/post/70236656155/somebody-made-a-post-that-i-the-self-procaimed) and inspired by [this post](http://savkobresia.tumblr.com/post/70225635895/teenytinytitanslayer-i-want-to-write-about) because I can't help myself when it comes to terrible puns. Decided I liked this one enough to post here too...

For the fourth time since the meeting had started, Commander Erwin outlined the formation for the Scouting Legion’s next expedition, the test that would help them to prove Eren Yeager’s usefulness (and complacency) to the doubtful members of the other military branches.  Though they wouldn’t be putting the plan to action for another week yet, the commander had insisted that every squad be prepared.  This was important material, Auruo knew that.  But that fact didn’t keep him from being bored as hell with the presentation.

Shifting his gaze around the table at the rest of the meeting’s participants, Auruo sighed.  Petra and Günter were dutifully making notes (as usual).  Erd was folding his copy of the map into a paper airplane of the finest level of craftsmanship.  Nanaba and Gerger were bickering under their breath about some detail or another.  Squad leader Hanji had their hand raised, poised to ask yet another of their one hundred questions.

To Auruo’s left, his captain sat with his eyes on the commander, who was now tracing the expedition route with his pointer, tapping on the board to emphasize certain locations.  As Auruo was about to resign himself to another hour alone with his thoughts, he heard Levi exhale with just the faintest hint of fatigue.

_Could it be that the captain isn’t paying attention either?_  Auruo thought.

He was afraid to look too far toward Levi for fear of seeming inattentive, but he was sure he could feel it.  If Erwin dragged the briefing out any longer, even the captain wouldn’t be able to take it.  The commander’s voice droned on in such a way that could put even humanity’s strongest warrior to sleep…

"…and that’s why, it is of the utmost importance that we keep this expedition as organized and on schedule as possible.  If anything goes wrong, the consequences will be enormous-"

"You might even say they’ll be… _titanic_ ," Auruo whispered under his breath without thinking.

Beside him, Levi choked down a laugh, startling the entire room.  Every eye turned to the captain, who suppressed his amusement into a thin smile, then straightened his gaze toward Erwin without saying a word.

Auruo was scared shitless.  As soon as the meeting was over he knew he’d be a dead man.  The brave soldier Auruo Bossard, 39 solo titan kills to his name, killed over a bad joke.  He swallowed loudly and forced himself to pay attention to the remainder of Erwin’s presentation while grimly awaiting the consequences of his thoughtless pun.

***

As the room cleared out and the commander parted from the crowd to return to his office, Auruo held his breath.  He made his way into the hall, with no sign of Levi anywhere, and then…

"Yikes!" Auruo jumped when he felt someone tap him on the shoulder.

He spun around to find himself face to face with the 5’3” embodiment of death, who was looking… mildly pleased?  Auruo was speechless.

"I can’t remember the last time anyone managed to make a joke out of one of Erwin’s piss-awful lectures," Levi said.  "Good one, Auruo."

Then the captain immediately departed for the mess hall, as if he hadn’t just given one of his soldiers the highest praise he’d ever heard in his life.

Mouth-agape and knees shaky, Auruo stood outside the meeting room, letting Levi’s comment sink in.   _'Good one, Auruo.'_    _Good one._   He, Auruo Bossard, had made the captain laugh.  It felt surreal, and-

"What are you smiling at?  Spacing out in the middle of the hall like this… some disciplined soldier you are, Auruo!"  Petra scolded.

She tapped him on the head with her rolled-up copy of the expedition plan, then gestured to the stairs.  The other members of the special operations squad were standing right behind her, waiting for Auruo to reply.

"Come on, aren’t you hungry?" She asked.  "The captain isn’t going to let you take an extended lunch break just because he thinks you’re funny…"

"You guys heard?" Auruo asked.

"You think Captain Levi laughs out loud every day?" Gunter responded. 

Erd nudged Auruo toward the stairs and the squad-mates left together for the mess hall.  But no matter how he tried, Auruo couldn’t hide his smile.  The grin didn’t leave his lips until late that night, when he finally drifted off to a well-deserved sleep.


End file.
